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The Decree Nisi: What Happens if I Ignore it?

Following the courts having granted you a Decree Nisi, you will be in a position to finalise your divorce by filing for a Decree Absolute six weeks and one day after the date on which this was pronounced. But what happens if, following you having received this document, you do nothing; not just for six weeks, but significantly longer?

Well, if you do nothing for more than 12 months then, should you later decide to attempt to apply for your Decree Absolute, you’ll be asked to explain the delay and, if you don’t have a good reason, then your original application will automatically become redundant, and you’ll need to begin the process again. Yes, that’s right, if you ignore your Decree Nisi for more than 12 months then chances are you’re going to need to start the process, and pay the court’s fees, again.

What, though, would happen if you simply decided, following you having received your Decree Nisi, that you no longer wanted a divorce? Well, under these circumstances it is clear that you should do nothing and allow the 12 months to pass. As your spouse will be able to apply for a Decree Absolute also, however, this is no guarantee that your divorce will not proceed.

A Respondent cannot also simply file for a Decree Absolute six weeks and one day after the Decree Nisi was issued, though. Instead, they are required by law to wait a further three months, will be required to pay a court fee and, what’s more, will also need to attend a hearing, along with the Petitioner.

During this hearing, the judge will determine whether or not there is a good reason why the Petitioner has not yet filed the documents required in order to finalise the divorce and legally end their marriage. The judge’s decision will then be dictated by this information.

So, depending on your circumstances, it can be appropriate or foolish to ignore a Decree Nisi. You should seek advice if you’re unsure of how to proceed.

What are the Differences Between a Two and Five-Year Divorce Petition?

This is another question that we’re regularly asked about the divorce paperwork that we prepare everyday here at Quickie Divorce and the answer is… well, simple really.

If you and your spouse have been living separately for two years or more, then you’ll file for a divorce on the grounds of two-year separation. Alternatively, if you’ve been living separately for more than five years, then you’ll file on the grounds of five-year separation. The only difference this will make to the petition is that one will state that you are filing as you and your spouse have lived separately for more than two years and both consent to the divorce whilst, in the alternative, it will state that you and your spouse have been living separately for more than five years.

Now, you may have noticed that in the event of a person filing for a divorce on the grounds of two-year separation, the petition will state that the couple consent to the divorce whilst this is not stated in a petition relying on five-year separation. This is because, in order to file on the former ground, both parties must consent to the divorce without exception. If a couple have been living separately for over five years, however, then consent is not required and, provided a respondent does not inform the courts that they wish to defend the divorce (something which is extremely rare) then it is possible to obtain a divorce without their consent if the couple have been living separately for more than five years.

The Quick Divorce: Accurate Phrase or a Myth to be Debunked?

The terms quick divorce and quickie divorce often arouse ire in legal professionals. Their anger is fuelled by news reports that are spun in such a way that it would appear that high profile celebrities and other privileged members of society are able to obtain a divorce in mere seconds.

In response, family lawyers point out the inaccuracy of such reports and draw attention to the fact that an uncontested divorce is, irrespective of an individual’s circumstances or wealth, unlikely to be finalised in less than 12 weeks whilst a contested divorce can take far longer. There is, they claim, no such thing as a quick divorce. Whilst media representations may paint an inaccurate picture of the length of time it can take to process a divorce, though, is it really fair to claim that the quick divorce is little more than a myth?

In order to discuss this effectively, the phrase ‘quick’ really needs to be placed in context. In some circumstances, the word ‘quick’ is redundant as it is accepted that what is being discussed or considered is certain to meet the criteria required to be considered fast or swift, such as an expensive sports car. In other instances, however, it is necessary to place a matter in perspective.

It is not appropriate to describe all people as quick, for example, but if an individual can meet a specific criteria – such as being able to run a certain distance within a predetermined time – then it is appropriate to refer to them as expedient. So, if we know that it will take at least three months for a divorce to be finalised, then it is also reasonable to claim that any divorce which is finalised within three months – or a similar timeframe – could indeed be referred to as a quick divorce.

Neither the quick divorce or the quickie divorce are myths, they are accurate phrases that have been sensationalised. Yes, it may take at least 12 weeks for a divorce to be finalised but this, when placed in context, is indeed quick.

Divorce Advice: it’s me or the job

Our careers are important to us but so are our marriages. It’s a shame, then, that these two important aspects of modern day life so often clash, with both our spouses and jobs competing for our attentions. Truth be told, careers are all too often behind marital dissolution and divorce. To many, the thought of allowing one’s career to cause a divorce is alien; their marriage will always come first. An equally large number of people are career-driven, however, and whilst these individuals will not necessarily put their careers before their marriages, they will expect their spouses to accept the fact that they’re dedicated to their job/employers and that they may, on occasions, arrive home a little later than their other half would like or perhaps work on the odd weekend or two. In some instances, a couple enter into a marriage knowing that one spouse will be required to dedicate a large amount of their time to their career and are initially willing to accommodate this only to later find that they find the situation intolerable. In other instances, one half of the marriage will find that the need to dedicate more time to their employers only emerges after several years of marriage. In either circumstance, one spouse’s career is more than capable of causing a divorce. Ultimately, if one spouse is career-driven, then there is every possibility that they will choose to put their job before their marriage and conclude that a divorce is the only option. Some may choose to avoid divorce, but if an individual is particularly focused on their career then, unfortunately, this is unlikely. What, though, can a spouse that is frustrated with their partner’s workaholic nature do to maintain their marriage and prevent a divorce? The answer, as is the case with the majority of marital dissatisfaction, is compromise. All spouses must accept that their partner will possess some fault and whilst they may be spending more time at work that they are with them, there is little point in filing for a divorce without first having tried to resolve matters. So any individual that finds themselves in this situation should discuss matters with their partner and explain that whilst they understand that their career is important to them, they feel like they need to make more of an effort at home. I’m not suggesting that this will bring about an instantaneous change in the offending spouse’s behaviour, but it might well bring about a residual change and if it doesn’t, well, then you can file for divorce knowing that you tried.

Divorce after 60 and why it can be the right Decision

Earlier this week, Quickie Divorce reported on the growing number of over-60s that are filing for divorce in the UK. This emerging trend has, since it first came to the public’s attention, been discussed far and wide, with several commentators having chosen to subject these elderly divorcees to severe criticism, not least Daily Mail columnist Bel Mooney who has claimed that any individual seeking a divorce in their later years is both stupid and selfish – an assessment that is not only churlish, but worryingly glib.

In fact, Mooney’s column is replete with superficial conclusion, claiming that later-life divorce results in familial estrangement, abolishes social lives and condemns at least one of the parties to a life of virtual solitude. Worse yet is the fact that Mooney seems content to assert that divorce in later life is nigh on always instigated by a husband who has found a new partner.

It is both bizarre and a shame that, in this day and age, someone can view divorce as a solely negative occurrence. It may be true that no divorce is ever without stress or heartbreak irrespective of context, but it also true that, in many instances, a divorce is in the best interest of both spouses, regardless of their age.

Mooney argues that it is selfish for one spouse to request a divorce when their husband or wife is happy in the marriage and blissfully unaware of their partner’s desire to leave. This conclusion, like the majority of the article in question, is imprudent. If one spouse is dissatisfied with their marriage, have unsuccessfully attempted to resolve matters and concluded that they would be happier apart, they would be doing not only themselves but also their partner a disservice if they chose to remain in an unhappy relationship.

As much as their partner may be left heartbroken by the divorce, time is a great healer and provided that the departing spouse treats their partner with compassion and respect, then however reprehensible their actions may appear to be, they are doing the right thing.

Living as a Child of Divorce

Any discussion concerning divorce invariably leads to a discussion concerning its effect on children – and rightfully so.

When a couple decide to divorce, the need to create suitable arrangements for any children they may have should be their paramount concern, something of which the vast majority of separating parents are fully aware. In spite of the fact that parents often do their utmost to ensure that children of divorce are cared for and have their emotional needs met, though, many people still believe that divorce will inevitably cause significant damage to any child that may be affected by it – an assessment which, in my opinion, is short-sighted and inaccurate.

I, myself am a child of divorce and whilst I cannot state with absolute confidence that my parent’s decision to separate has had no effect on me, I am confident in stating that any influence it may have had was negligible. My particular situation was atypical, though. My parents’ divorce was finalised when I was very young and I have no memory of us living together as a family.

I do, however, recall a time when just my mother and I shared a modest home in one of south Wales’ many suburbs and whilst some of the negative consequences of my parents’ separation may have left me with the odd unhappy memory, they are few and far between. In particular, I remember wishing that I saw more of my mother. She had been employed as a nurse prior to her divorce and remained so as a single mother in spite of the fact that it was a role that saw her regularly work long and unsociable hours. I was still adequately cared for during this period of my life, however, my mother ensured that we spent time together whenever possible and my maternal grandparents – not my father – played an active role in my upbringing.

My father, unfortunately, became estranged following the divorce. But this had little effect on me as a result of my step-father becoming a regular fixture in my life by the time I was five. I am happy to say that I have never felt as though he viewed me any differently than he did his own children, my half-sisters who were born when I was 8 and 10 respectively.

Many other children of divorce will not be as fortunate, of course, but I believe that the relevance of this post lies in the fact that my parent’s divorce has not had a significant effect on me regardless of me gradually losing contact with my biological father and my mother’s enforced absences during my formative years.

In short, whilst my parent’s divorce could have had a significant and adverse effect on me, it did not because of the support my mother was afforded by her extended family and new partner. Divorce can have a negative effect on children, yes, but, irrespective of the circumstances, it does not have to.

Divorce is on the up Amongst the over-60s, but why?

More and more couples are choosing to file for divorce in their 60s, flying in the face of current trends, according to recent reports. The UK’s divorce rate may have fallen by 11 per cent in the past two years, but the divorce rate amongst the over-60s rose by four per cent in the same period. In fact, over 11,500 over-60s filed for a divorce in the UK in 2009. Not only does this finding defy current divorce trends, it also challenges many people assumptions. It has long been presumed that older couples – particularly those who have effectively weathered the storms brought about by everyday life and reached retirement – will enjoy secure marriages. It is also widely believed that older generations view divorce less favourably and that both this and the daunting prospect of living alone after having resided with a partner for several decades will deter older generations from divorce, but these assumptions are now out-dated. Divorce is now acceptable to all but the staunchest traditionalist, whilst the development of the internet and any number of burgeoning online communities have made it far easier for the elderly to find companionship, romantic or otherwise. Equally relevant is the fact that younger couples are avoiding divorce not because they are intent on avoiding it, but simply because they cannot afford to separate. With older individuals certain to have fewer outgoings and dependents, though, they will have a significantly larger amount of disposable income. Additionally, many older couples have claimed found that they no longer communicated with one another following their children having left home and that it was this that ultimately prompted their decision to divorce. Whilst reports have indicated that more over-60s are filing for divorce, however, only 5 per cent of all divorces that were finalised in 2009 involved an individual over the age of sixty. In comparison, 34.3 per cent of divorces were between couples in their 40s and 33.6 per cent between those in their 30s.

Divorce Advice: A Better way to help your Staff Divorce

Divorce is disruptive and it is not uncommon for an employee’s performance to be adversely affected whilst they are caught in its midst. The effect that divorce has on companies and the economy is so prevalent, in fact, that Quickie Divorce posted on the subject only last month.

Fortunately, though, a few articles appeared over the weekend that showed that many companies operating within the UK are aware of this problem, with some even helping their staff by paying for their legal fees. Sources have confirmed, however, that only smaller companies have been willing to help their employees pay for their divorces and that only individuals in senior positions are likely to have their legal fees paid for in their entirety.

Whilst there can be little doubt that providing an employee with financial assistance during their divorce will certainly help that individual to maintain their performance and increase staff loyalty, Quickie Divorce believes that companies that want to assist divorcing employees would be best advised to pay for the services of mediators and online divorce providers rather than solicitors as their services are not only more cost efficient, but also less adversarial and therefore less likely to cause an employee significant stress.

Mediators encourage divorcing couples to arrive at an amicable settlement designed to meet the needs of both parties. What’s more, these settlements are formed during roundtable discussions during which the mediator assists both spouses. As a result, a divorce settlement can usually be agreed quickly and efficiently, cutting both costs and the stress associated with divorce. When such an agreement is reached, an online divorce company can then be instructed to apply for and finalise both the couple’s divorce and their financial settlement via a legally binding consent order.

All in all, utilising mediators and online divorce providers could save any company paying for an employee’s divorce thousands. Additionally, this process encourages the couple in question to divorce amicably so employers will not only save money but will also prevent the employee’s divorce from doing significant psychological damage and as any business owner will tell you: 'a happy worker is a productive worker.'

Divorce will cost Katie Price £2m this year

Her modelling career and entrepreneurial spirit may have netted her £30m, but her impending divorce from Alex Reid and continuing maintenance payments to first husband Peter Andre are set to leave a significant dent in Katie Price’s personal fortune. The model’s on-going divorce from cage-fighter Reid has seen her accrue £500,000 in legal fees this year and she is also expected to provider her husband of 11 months with s £1m divorce settlement. Price is also required to provide first husband, Andre, with £15,000 a month in maintenance and her financial team have estimated that the combined costs of her divorce and this maintenance will total £2m in 2011. Despite her vast riches, Price, 33, is understandably annoyed. She recently informed Closer magazine that she feels that her former partners are ‘bleeding her dry’. A friend of the model also informed the magazine that Price is annoyed with herself and should not have trusted either Andre or Reid. Price’s divorce from Andre was well publicised and often acrimonious with the former pop-star issuing the model with a writ following her having commented on the aforementioned maintenance payments whilst appearing as a guest on the BBC’s Graham Norton Show. Reports have indicated that the matter is yet to be concluded.

Couple in the Midst of Divorce Ordered to Hand Over Their Facebook Passwords

An American couple in the middle of a divorce have been directed to reveal their Facebook passwords to their spouse’s lawyers according to reports. The judge decided that the order was appropriate after having heard that one half of the divorcing couple, Stephen Gallion, had found a series of messages that his wife, Courtney, had sent to a Facebook friend within which she had discussed how she felt about the children and her ability to provide them with the level of care they required. Believing that these messages would assist Mr Gallion in obtaining custody of his children following the couple’s divorce, his lawyer, Gary Traystman, contacted Mrs Gallion’s representative and politely requested that she provide him with her password to the social networking site. Mrs Gallion, initially resisted the request, but, following legal advice, relented and provided Mr Traystman with her password, but also passed this information on to a friend, instructing her to delete the offending messages. Having been made aware of this, Mr Traystman contacted the court requesting that an injunction be issued to prevent Mrs Gallion from deleting any further messages and compel both spouses to provide the other’s representative with their login details. The application was heard on the 29th September and, following deliberation, the presiding judge declared that both Mr and Mrs Gallion were to comply with the order, though neither was to visit the others page and all relevant evidence was to be gathered by the parties’ representatives. Reactions to what is sure to become a landmark judgement have been mixed, some commentators claiming that this information should be disclosed in all divorce proceedings, others claiming that it constitutes an invasion of privacy and a clear breach of Facebook’s terms of service. What do you think? Please leave a comment.

Divorce in the Arts: Love Will Tear Us Apart

Before I begin, I would like to apologise for the fact that Quickie Divorce’s regular ‘Divorce in the Arts’ feature is a bit late this month, but the much maligned Family Law Review, which was published last Thursday, clearly needed to be discussed. Anyway, the subject of this month’s article holds a special place in my heart: Joy Division’s classic ode to marital disharmony, Love Will Tear Us Apart. I first heard this song when I was 14 years old and whilst I would not appreciate the tale of failed marriage and divorce communicated within it for several years, its soaring riffs and mesmerising vocals made an instant impression. I was too young to fully appreciate the narrative present within the song’s lyrics, but the track’s components – Ian Curtis’s vocal, in particular – left me in no doubt that what was being recounted was a tale of pain and despair, the song’s title confirming that these negative emotions were linked to love in some way whether it be lost, unrequited or absent. In my later years, I learned that this song had been written by a man caught in the midst of marital disharmony; an individual waiting for his then wife to commence divorce proceedings, though still in love with her and hoping, desperately, for reconciliation. Curtis’s lyrics paint a picture of desolation, of a couple that simply can no longer communicate, that lie next to each other in complete silence. Of a couple that resides together in what was once a happy home that is now tarnished by the frosty atmosphere bred by their mutual disdain for one another. In spite of this, though, the song also spoke of a desire to resolve these issues and return to wedded bliss, expressing the sort of diverse emotions that anyone that has ever been in a romantic relationship can relate to. Love Will Tear Us Apart is without a shadow of a doubt one of the greatest songs ever written. It is a song that somehow manages to recount a tale of the absolute despair that divorce brings whilst backed by sumptuous melody. It, put simply, deserves pride of place in any record collection.

Will your Divorce be Delayed by the Government’s Austerity Plans?

Every day, it seems, new and adverse effects of government cuts are being identified. Now, many legal professionals are claiming that the lack of funding available to the family courts will result in it taking far longer for couples to divorce, even if the matter is entirely uncontested. Following these concerns having come to light, Quickie Divorce has been inundated with calls and emails from would be divorcees querying their validity, and whilst we inform them that we have not yet noticed any delays, we also state that it is only logical to conclude that the judiciary’s time will be severely restricted following these cuts having truly begun to take effect and that this is likely to result in significant delays. Fortunately, though, last week’s Family Justice Review contained a proposal that could potentially prevent this. Arguing that it is simply not necessary for judges to have any involvement in any uncontested divorce, the review has advised that all applications for uncontested divorces should be handled by a court’s administrative staff only; a recommendation that Quickie Divorce wishes to add its unwavering support. Why, after all, does a judge need to be involved when a couple are in full agreement to not only their divorce, but also the division of assets and childcare? Many may feel that a judge is the only individual that is capable of determining whether or not satisfactory grounds for a divorce exist or if the divorcing couple have ensured that adequate plans for the children of the marriage are in place. These individuals are, however – with the greatest of respect – mistaken; administrative staff are more than capable of rubberstamping any petition concerning an uncontested divorce. When tasks are delegated correctly, productivity and efficiency will invariably improve. The recommendation discussed above serves as clear proof of the fact that the authors of the Family Justice Review recognise this. Removing the need for a judge to review all divorce petitions when matters are uncontested will not only afford the judiciary additional time to address other matters, but will also almost certainly result in uncontested divorce being processed at a significantly faster rate. This proposal represents a step in the right direction. Let’s hope the government give it the consideration it clearly deserves.

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